ABC Steals the Worst Reality Show Idea Ever: ‘Celebrity’ Diving
We’ve seen C and D-list celebrities dance, live in houses together, and go through couples therapy — all for our amusement. Now they’ll be putting themselves in the ultimate danger by diving off of things. Again.
Despite the exact same show, ‘Stars in Danger: The High Dive,’ not working at all and being a ratings disaster on FOX, ABC still thinks its a good idea to film a show about people we barely care about anymore jumping off a diving board and into a pool.
Here’s the list of “celebrities” who will be doing pencil dives, cannonballs and belly flops on the program entitled ‘Splash':
- Louie Anderson, grating-voiced comedian who was once a cartoon character
- Drake Bell, one half on Nickelodeon’s old show ‘Drake & Josh’
- Chuy Bravo, Chelsea Handler‘s personal assistant and miniature punching bag
- Nicole Eggert, the only ‘Baywatch‘ star who wasn’t good enough for ‘Stars in Danger’
- Keshia Knight Pulliam, Rudy from ‘The Cosby Show’
- Ndamukong Suh, member of the Detroit Lions (hey, he might have discernible talent)
- Katherine Webb, former Miss Alabama and current television eye candy
- Kendra Wilkinson, the former Playboy model who refuses to stop appearing on reality shows
And if none of those has-beens piqued your interest, there are still two more participants yet to be announced. Who could it be? Charo? Flava Flav? The living half of Milli Vanilli?
While most of the named contestants seem like exactly the sort of people who’d be on a show like this, it’s worth noting that Webb — who launched to instant fame after sportscaster Brent Musburger ogled her on-air during the BCS Championship game a couple weeks ago — reportedly turned down an offer from ‘Dancing With the Stars’ to do this mess instead. So that was totally smart.
‘Splash’ premieres Tuesday, March 19 on ABC. You can set your DVRs, but don’t be surprised if they silently judge you in return.